New Idea for "Boomers" Still Shy of Age 60
Oakland, Calif.
April 1, 2009 -- The lure of Senior Citizen benefits at chain restaurants and discount clothing stores is drawing many of the post-WWII crowd to move their Sixtieth Birthday up a few months to an entire year thanks to a service recently introduced to The Golden State.
Melvin Obama, no relation to the President (for all we know), opened Birthday Advance Centers in several Bay Area cities just before Thanksgiving and reports what he calls "land-office business." "It struck me how much I could save by being 60 instead of 59 last year, but when I looked for anything in the private or public sectors I was shocked and morally outraged that nothing at all was being done. It became my personal duty to step in and meet the need," Mr. Obama explained from his East Bay home.
"For a reasonable fee we provide the interested party a special Birthday Card as well as several forms of identification indicating what we call an 'Advanced Birthday' that qualifies for 60+ perks typically denied to people who are only 59 and under. I'd think someone was crazy who really wanted to be 60 a few years ago, but today 60 is the new 50."
The service comes with a price. Customers sign an agreement to relinquish half their birthday cake and one-third the value of their cards and gifts on the actual sixtieth birthday as designated on their birth certificate or driver license.
"So far the deadbeats haven't been that much a problem. I mean, who would want it made public that he or she was actually an age-cheat?" commented Mr. Obama.
No comments:
Post a Comment